Sunday, September 03, 2006 

 Cocktail Anyone? 


Comrades Fatties

Welcome to my new track The Cocktail Hour remixed and made melodic by the delightful and dandy, underground hotpants lover Plastic Trash, though I like to call him by the more enigmatic monika Mr Trash,allthough I might now call him Enigmatic Monika because somebody just has to be called that,it would be sinfull not to.This track is a paen to honesty and life. The Cocktail Hour exhists everywhere,it's a time where debauchery and desire collide and make a mockery of the socialised norms that have driven so many people to suicide and distraction.It's a poem about prostitution Comrades not only the oldest proffession but the noblest one.Without the multi gendered geniouse of thier exhistence there could be no such thing as socitey,they have paradoxically kept this whole stinking quagmire afloat and are the unsung heroes of normality.Religion and Patriarchy have devistated the human identity made it something it should never have been, it has curtailed it's development and made invisible it's freedoms,telling us always not to.To be angry at desire and to hate people who are free to express there sexual and personal voodoo.It has made oppression the dominant force in the human psyche not just of others but of self.So where do the self oppressed oppressers go when they want to feel the glory of freedom?They go to the only people who understand,they go to the people they oppress,they go to The Whore.Be it high class to crack-head every whore has the knowledge that this reality is but a thin filmic sheen barely hiding and making opaque the truth,the blur of respectabilty comrades so vivid to the underground.I spent a little time as a whore not in a funny drag ha-ha way but really.I was a happy hooker brcause I chose it,it wasn't avalanched on me by nessecity.The time I opperated was around five to ten a tme I called the cocktail hour,where light meets dusk and hands over the baton of  responsibility, a relay race that just might be eternal.It may seem quiet at this time but don't be decieved Comrades it's just the underground getting ready to run.Alive isn't the word,it's more than that it's the truth,so much activity a hive of creativity and sluttishness."hey Mr Respectible wanna buy me a drink"says the whore"sure!"Mr respectable replys"But you gotta let me shit on your face,I cant tell you my name I'v a class tommorrow." And so it goes, one example leaving ajar the window of infinities for any fucker grand or poor to stare into.Praise The Whore Comrades they have been our soothsayers and our condemmed for centuries,true sorcerers leaving spellbound many a witchfinder or docker.I love them , they lie because we demand them to and know the truth we're ashamed to admit.I think this power puts them above the Gods or underneath the Gods as long as the Gods are paying they can put them wherever they want.This blog is dedicated to the prostitute ,hooker and shamen.To St Whore long may she riegn or piss"Whatever you want Dearie"Comrade PoemsX 


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Wednesday, August 30, 2006 

 Comes Before The Fall 


Comrades Lambs

It's been a funny old time this past couple of weeks,been through a tornado of stuff whirlwinding and blustering my way across the tumble-weed strewn streets of that old deserted north-western town called life and death.As usual it has left deep in thought and tired,tired not because of grief but because i'v partied my way to a sore throat and painful calves,I haven't stopped dancing yet.It was Mancester Pride weekend Comrades and what a pile of childish unthoughtout crap it was.I know i'v whittered on before about so called Pride events but I cant help feeling the gay community is being taken for a Pride ride.I wandered  some littlle time around what I can only call it's arrogant devastation and again was left wondering what the fuck is all this about.The main stage once again was awash with a torrent of banal insulting half baked caberet acts and ranting D.Js demanding in shrill unlovley tones that I have a good time.I didn't have a good time and once again was raging at the very visible way my community has been dumbed down.Comrades we're being sold down the Swanee by these so called celebations.I really did try to give the whole Pride thing a second chance as I thought I'd been a bit hard on them in the past,I now realise I hav'nt been at all.I was dismayed at how expensive the whole event was £4.50 for a crappy burger had me incensed.Pride surely has to be about the community that lives around it,now take my word for it Comrades for all the regeneration Manchester boasts of it is not a rich city, there are great swathes of poverty still very tangible in it's streets and alleyways.Thats why I think Prides have to be free so that every part of the gay world is served by it and if that means it has to be a smaller festival then so be it.It certainly doesn't need a mainstage of such banal drivel when it  can have great caberet stage with a truly eclectic mix of local and national performers,the stage in Sackville Park was dreadfully ignored by the organisers and had some of the best moments of the festival Rosie Lugosi and Jonathon Mayer to name but two.When are we as a community going to wake up to the fact that what was once free we now have to pay for it goes against the very core notions of those original truely proud Pride events.That leads me neatly to the best event of the weekend Club Brenda,a great night of partying and local entertainment.Club Brenda is proud of it's commitment to the real,surreal and avant garde.It's a deliberately cheap night out with the passion of raving and the energy of the underground, possibly the only true queer event in and around pride.We had five very diferent Perfomers and bands playing and D.Js who really cared for the music they we're resonsible for and  not screaming out are you having a good time, a big shout out to Bev your the reason my legs hurt and my heart is full.Club Brenda is living proof that you dont need all the money in the world to entertain the world.Pride could learn a lot from the polotics of small, embrace and recognise it's dealing with people not numbers and that some of it's people are not rich loft style apartment dwelling steryotypes but struggling real people who need to be reprosented equally.If any Pride people read this then please take on bored my comments with intellect and not dismiss them as the ragings of an old fashioned communist like you have before,perhaps we could talk together and make a more rounded and real event.Goodbye yellow bick road you never exhisted.Comrade Poems X


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Saturday, August 19, 2006 

 Good Grief? 

Comrades Humans
It's been a funny old week warm,performed,drunken and full.To full.Life has done that thing it does best and surprised nay shocked its way into the very core of my being.An awful thing has happened and now I am grieving, an enormouse important physical energy has left me and is rapidly turning into legend.I am no stranger to the enormety of the grieving process,I am in fact without trying to sound self important and overblown a past and present mistress of it.I'm touched by death Comrades it has been touching maybe even grooming me like some invisible abuser since childhood, I dont wish to explain more than that you just have to take my gingham word for it.So here I am reeling once again, knowing and not knowing quite what to do or say but i'll try.I think grief has been my greatest teacher Comrades, it never ceases to amaze me on how many levels it works,it's as if it has so much to tell you but can only communicate in a million inaudable whispers that bombard your head leaving you with the same old tired cliches to impart to your living loved ones.So thank The Horned Beast for blogging so I can talk of the other titbits i'v picked up through the years.I don't think love is the answer Comrades or is it all we need I think it's inconsistant sentimentality often get's in the way of emotional debate. Damn the Beetles for that appaling slice of bedraggled mush love is not all we need,We need a deeper,sounder , stoic undrestanding of grief. Why? I empathically hear you challenge exept for those of you who are asking. I'll tell you for why.Grief has for too long lived in the shadow of love unable to state it's case because love has held it in check I would even say bullied it into a silent untalked through submission, such is the hold love has on grief it dissallowes it's teachings.Grief for me is the single biggest emotion binding and unifying us.It has the most profound effects like an invisible earthquake shockwaving it's way to our deepest foundations leaving us wavering,crumbling and debri.I as a human being want this grieving thing to happen as little as it possibly can so no more war,no more guncrimes, free medication dammit and food and water for everyone. I don't think we can truly know what dying means unless we talk about it as freely as we do love.Love has never made rain but no rain makes grief.In my opinon Comrades the world is grieving and as usual we're not talking about it and how can we when we're bogged down in inactive socialised sentiments.Grief has taught me about the need to reach out collectivlly and try to know the hells and heavens of others not in a religiouse but humanist way.I believe grief is the new love and infinateley able to teach us more than love ever could.I havn't a downwer on love,I adore it Comrades and am aware that it is the love I have for my brother which is fuelling my grief .It's I just think grief at this moment is not only my own but attached ingloriously to other peoples,I gennuinely don't feel alone right now. If we try to make it real and not invalidate it Im sure we could in some way make the world a better place.I still think the gay community has'nt talked enough about the past and continuing impact of A.I.D.S.and needs to look longer at the emotional fallout it has caused.I think tuning into our collective grief would make us better at living the life it leaves us with.I dedicate this blog to Paul Butler a fine,good and generouse man who might never of known just how much he was loved. I wish the grieving of our world and that's a massive amount of people health,happiness healing and the good knowledge grief can bring. Comrade Poems X

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Thursday, August 17, 2006 

 Gay Civil War 


Comrades Babes

Hope all gloriouse and whistfull with you.In the lovely village of Bristol last night gigging my little gingham socks off at an alternative pride gig organised by people who demand something more than Abba and The Cheeky Girls.When I say village I mean it is a city with the ambience of a village.The Cheeky fucking Girls!What on earth has been and continues to go on with our so called Queer festivals,The Cheeky Girls. No disrespect to thier huge and unfathomable talent and for thier obvious unshakeable commitment to gay rights,[I hear they are at this very moment attempting to assasinate Bob Mugabe or is it The Sugarbabes who knows,showbuisness has a way of confusing even the most intellectual of minds]but what do they do?They do my head in thats what they do.Who thinks in the great scheme of Queerness that they somehow can contribute to it.What adult and I stress the word adult has decided they can say anything to me about my life. The Cheeky Fucking Girls!The gig last night was a welcome and much needed antidote to such unthoughtout inanity.It was unashamedly a Queer poetry gig dealing with the profoundly adult themes surrounding being Queer,it was a joy sharing a stage with Caleb Parkin,Andi Langford-Wood s{no relation to the rather less talented and more shrill Bonnie Langford-Woods]the hilarious Mo the Peoples Nun,Poetry Jack and two delightfull open mikers. We talked and rhymed for hours about the passionate and funny things that both ring our bells and tick our tocks,we meant what we we're saying and said it with a hurricane like gusto,it was good,filthy and just.The Cheeky Girls have all the passion of a lonely death.To make this thing called gay make any sense we have to stop reaching for the lowest common denominater and succeeding.Other festvals have so much more on offer a wide ranging feast of adult music and caberet and what are we lumbered with tacky drag queens who can't let go of the fifties and The Cheeky fucking Girls grow up gays its about bloody time.I know poetry gigs are not every gays cup of crystal meth but there are other things.I believe and have for some considerable time believed that we are in a state of gay civil war and I don't just mean partnerships.I totally embrace the notion of civil war  Comrades and more than wellcome the fallout.I abhore how we are being treated by the press and media Queer Eye For A Straight Guy comes to mind, insipid pawns prancing servile around the enigmatic mystery of straight men and I abhore how some gay people think that this somehow contributes to our so called emancipation , Iv always said a little emancipation is a dangerous thing,all or nothing Comrades,All or nothing.Thank God for Russel T Davies and Dr Who a ray of dense and intelligent gay light in this dark pink innoffensive quagmire.Let the battles commence and let me sign up as a soildier ready to take on boared my duties done my gingham uniform  fight the good fight and demand more than childish pop acts to grace our so called Pride stages because  I can assure you Comrades Im not proud of them[why can't we have the lovely Patti Smith or something that simply means something.]So let the heterosexualisation  of  homosexuality commence but be prepared for the resistence.Say allo allo to the real freedom fighters who want to keep queer as bright and shining as it should be stark vivid and unafraid,intelligent and telling, not  playthings for Jonathon Ross and Cilla Black.Take Care my pink warmongers,untill we meet again.Comrade PoemsX


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Tuesday, August 15, 2006 

 boozin' 


Comrades Chuckie Eggs

What a night!I had a fab time drinking with my good friend and confidente David Hoyle a fellow performer who seems to get what I do.We drink well together Comrades,guzzlers of booze so potent and parched we leave other drinkers standing while we stagger confidently and languidly in and around the corrosive cobbles of Banal Street.We're rather an explosive force when together,both unafraid to laugh raucously and row ferociously a great cobination of determined views and honesty.It amazes me Comrades how many people can find this dificult.To me boozing is about surrendering yourself to it's improvising passion,if your going to imbibe something that releases inhibitions then surely you have to have the good grace to simply go with it.Simple isn't it Comrades but not so for some people.We we're once in a gay bar called The Rembandt,and were as you might suspect pissed not ridiculousely  but pleasantly so, having what is commonly known in some quarters as a good old fashoned camp laugh.We laugh long and hard Comrades and are not crippled by the banality of manners,laughing is meant to be meant isn't it?Well the next thing a burly and somewhat surley bar manager comes over and asks us to leave,when we mock woundedly asked why he told us without irony and emotion that we wer'e too camp.Too camp,can you Adam and Steve it?Too camp to be in a gay bar.We wer'e more than shocked so much so we couldn't even be angry,  we just laughed louder and left.See what I mean about people not being able to handle it.How odd and dark some folk can be,that bastard had no care or reasoning about what he did to his fellow gay man and absoulutely no camprehension of community it was to all intents and purpouses a queer bashing by a queer who didn't like what some queers do best,laughing.How deeply wierd.Anyway enough of giving that idiot space,David and I had a fine and dandy night giving boozing the dignity and compassion it so completly and   rightfully deserves. I know some people genuinely dont like drunks and I suppose thats fine but the relationship wether it healthy or damaging between gay men and alcohol is a profound one and really should at least tried to be understood more.Heres to getting pissed Comrades and to all the foggy disco profundity it can bring long may we stagger,laugh and row, long may we continue to apologise for our actions and the go and do exactly the same thing again.While there are are boozers let there be the boozed.Bottoms up[hopefully.] Comrade Poems X


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Sunday, August 13, 2006 

 Pauline Collins 


Comrades Femmes

How the Horned Beast are you,well I hope.I'm in London at the mo nursing the mother of all hangovers,ooooooooh it's sore.I'm in some way muddleing through and remembering that for every painfull inch of my body there was a hell of a  good time responsible.I performed at River House last night a drop in centre for people dealing with H.I.V. people,a fine organisation that supports many folk in the Hammersmith and Fulham areas.It was thier 18th birthday bash and I hosted how you say in your country "the do".The wine and tuther booze were complimentry and flowed down my dolly screech as easy and as simply as say oysters or mayhap sperm.Red wine Comrades has such an up effect on me honestly it's akin to drinking speed,so I was a very exuberant host.It was great fun and the other acts involved were superb,so many talented people go unrecognised in this country while so many untalented do,no disrespect monsignor Jade Goody or the reverend Channtelle but what is it exactly you do?It.s a touch soul destroying comrades watching incrediblly gifted people looked over in favour of a telivision trend for reality space wasters.If thier has to be television then surley it should be developing and nurturing people who can do something,last night I wittnessed one of the finest percussionists ever a true and enormouse talent but thats his downfall,he's actually taken the time to learn something and become good at it he's rehearsed and is dedicated to his craft so sadly theres no space on the inellectual tube box for him.Reality T.V is a wretched and dangerouse trend making people think you dont have to be good at anything to be famouse or earn money.Good luck to anybody who wants to earn a few bob screwing the tabloids Iv no truck with that it's just that a new breed of wastfull indolence is manifesting allowing people to think all that matters is being famouse,a shame a great and despairing shame.I met the lovely Pauline Collins who was indeed great fun we chatted and mused about stuff I was happy to hear two of her kids are performance poets.I ignored her illustriouse and glittering carreer and obsessed to her about a part she played in a 1967 adventure of Dr Who she played Samantha Briggs a fiesty scouse character opposite my favourite of all doctors Patrick Troughton it was as if she hadnt done anything else,she was a lovely woman.So a good night was had by all and we imbibed the fun stuffs and danced and talked and boy did we talk all night.It was great to see my good friend Fas and we laughed at allmost anything for many houres.Rest well my pink Comrades and untill we cyber again farewell.Comrade Poems X 


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Saturday, August 12, 2006 

 Hidden Track 


Comrades Butches

Just a little blog to inform you of a hidden track that comes some little time after The Queen Sucks Nazi Cock.It's rather confessional in it's approach and is a firm favourite in my live sets,almost never fails to bring a tear to the eye of even the hardest nosed audience member.In fact and this is as true as im typing this, a Catholic priest who often comes to see my shows wishes he could play it in church,he says it could help young confused gay people to talk about thier feelings.I agree it has the power to stimulate a healthy and neccesary debate.We are still not recognising gay teenagers identities and they are still being brought up as though they are straight adding even more confusion and upset.It's a true story Comrades in the hell that was my effeminate youth Mr Christ was the only being I could trust with my guilty secret.A shame it was all a pack of lies because if he were real I should like to thank him for the comfort he gave me in that great cavernouse place called church and life.It wasn't true though was it?When are we going to recognise telling lies to children is wrong,now would be good but soon will do.The sooner the better.It's late and Im a little emotional and tired a good combination because soon I shall be asleep and hopefully dreaming my fondest dream where I teach people to fly,honest it's totally invigorating and I think has kept me sane,you might call it a gift.I wish you health happiness and healing Comrades pink or otherwise.Comrade Poems X


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Thursday, August 10, 2006 

 Vada! 

Comrades Hotstuffs
Hope alls well and good with you all in blogsville.Last nights Vada event was a triumph for all concerned,what a joy to see The Green Room full to capacity it warms the cockles of my gingham heart to see such support.It was one of those nights were everything goes right not just because its good quality entertainment but also the community of audience was behind it ,as a performer I do try to make the evening reach out to an audience even if that means making them uncomfortable.I think its the performers job to be as honest as they possibly can and all the cast did that admerably{not a terribly good speller Comrades] and with conviction.Long live the community project so many people run  such ventures down without ever giving time to actually understand what they achieve.The Daily Mail reader might be appalled at what had been achieved last night, appalled that it was given a little funding, appalled because it challenged orthodoxy, appalled that queer people are given a voice, appalled because somehow in thier emotionally distilled heads they know this is the future, appalled because  every day they have to say another little goodbye to an England that never exhisted,realising that Sid James and Margerate Rutherford{both of whom I adore as actors]are finally and really  dead as thier ideals.The performance talked a lot about civil partnerships a topic I am not totally sold on.It seems to me Comrades we are just mimicking an heterasexual flawed construct,and we're running into it with our gay eyes wide shut.It seems to me we are apeing things that have constantly failed,how many straight marrages last, divorce is at an all time high.Look at your parents Comrades or more pertinately your parent,where they happy in thier straight marriage.I just have to ask my whore friends how many married men they have and are discontent.We're Queer Comrades outsiders made so by a society that  didnt want us,my nightmare is we assimlate so much into this broken world that we become just like them Stepford Queers suburban and subdued opposing the building of asylum seekers centres not because they're unjust but because they'll drive our house prices down,Im frightened well become that equal.The heterosexualisation of homosexuality is reaching epidemic proportions.Anyway it was a jolly night and there was cake.A queer community organisation was ten and rightfully celebrated it,so happy birthday Vada and heres to your sustained and creative future.Comrade Poems X


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Wednesday, August 09, 2006 

 today 


Comrades Duckies

I was told today that blogging is meant to be a diary like affair documenting your day to day activities and not a sounding board for your personal and partly political rantings.Oops!I wish I'd known sooner then I could have not informed you on what motivates me and informed you what gets me outta bed,well usually it's the shrill whitterings of my phone alarm which I promptly halt and stagger to bed because iv fallen asleep to another Dr Who video the night before,Im a slave to insomnia Comrades a total slave. After I crawl from my bed I then have a wee witch I prefer to call an us because Im terminally inclusive lets face it Im not the only tranny who wee's so a collective noun siuts me fine.I have an us the stagger to my ill designed newly fitted council kitchen and Rubiks Cube myself a cup of tea,oh by the way the tellys on and Im droning out to either Big Brother or the infinately superior Cash in the Attic a programme designed to make us empathise with the plight of the very rich because they have to raise £2,000 to fix thier kettle,that or 60 Minute Makeover with the delightfully scouse Claire Sweeney Todd the Demon Barbera.Im often very fuzzy, years of alchahol and substance joy have left me slow and everso slightly intangible in the mornings,almost a hologramme of my former self.Then i'll decide a plan of action that could involve the isolating horror of writing or the procrastinating joy of absoulutely anything else.Today I had a poo brushed my teeth dressed and saunted languidly to a wonderfull cafe called The Basement in Lever St city centre Manchester what a grand place so easy to be in in reminds of Berlin cafes I recently had the joy of visiting.Its a non profit voluntary organisation who genuinlly care and give a fuck.Thought about writing and how you put it off,succeeded  finished my tea and went to see my liddle baby.Now Comrades I haven't fathered a child pretend or tutherwise my liddle baby is a springer spaniel called Henna a fine figure of a bitch with whom I share an even more special relationship with than Bush could ever share with Blair.She is everything to me we're the Heathcliffe and Cathy of dog walking she adores me making it impossible for me not to adore her,there are stories waiting to be written of our love by a brave auther somewhere who doesn't mind risking a short sentence in jail.I shall be performing tonight at Vada's tenth birthday bash.Vada are a community theatre group formed and run by queer people of Manchester who are determined to perform and express themselves and they've achieved it without a visit from Kylie or her more talented sister Danni,Maddonnas never popped in for a rehearsal or even donated so much as a henna tatoo, how have they managed without such sacred celebrity endoresment you holler.They manage because the believe in the interconnectivity of community and not the harsh inividulism of celebrity did you know the Beckhams havent even sent them a good luck card.OOOOOH there I go again it seems I cant stop ranting on about such things,what am I like.Next time Ill tell you whats on my shopping list or how many vodka and oranges I managed to drown.Who knows I might even kop off and make drunken involuntery love to somebody who in a soapy T.V way could be my half brother or sister such are the convoluted realities of the genres storylines anything is possible.Must sign off have to prepare my set for the evening,"A Tranny Prepares" you know that sort of thing,Im quite Method when it comes to performance will probably do "Canal Streets Biggest Celebrity" tonight just for Minxy fun.Take all the care you want to Comrades.Until we meet again,Comrade Poems.XXXX 


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Monday, August 07, 2006 

 Im Not Gay 


Comrades Chickens

What an odd title you might be muttering Chloe claiming she's not gay,well let me tell you summat Comrades it's not me disclaiming my sexuality it is an accusation often levelled at me by tuthers.How can people claim your not gay I hear you mutter in amazement,well tis beyond me too.The horror of this aaccusation leaves me colder than Thatchers heart but I get it all the time.Now Im not afraid to point the finger at anything i find offensive nor does it bother me that people find me offensive but to be raped of my sexuality because i dare to say Maddonna is the thatcher of pop or the most interesting thing Kylie has ever said is La la la la la la la or the Beckhams are meaningless is assinine.Challenge my opinions by all means I welcome it,love debate comrades thrive on it but trying to make me not gay aint gonna work.What is gay then?Im finding it  harder and harder to work out.Apparently it's about being rich and being into people who will never know your name, how sad comrades.For rich see debt,this is another reason Im not gay because I highlight the corossive hold capitalsm has on our culture its as if one isnt allowed to discuss it ,its as if debt is our only option.Im also not gay because I try to talk of the amount of mental health problems there are all to visibly on the scene,to me its as plain as the augmented noses on our faces ,the scene is crazy,but to suggest it is somehow seen as telling tales talking out of school as it were.Im not gay because I suggest the scene to often be facistic or racist,it is.Its a youth obbsessed style and body conscious nightmare which leaves so many gay people uninvolved and  desolate and it is my championing of the dissposessd which is seen by some as anti-gay, my hatred of misoginist  homophobic yes homophobic drag queens is seen as sacriligiose in many a pink quarter.If Im not gay becauase I care about these things then fine but then you have to then ask yourself why you are gay,not a pretty proposition is it.I love gay people I love what we as a culture have achieved and I dont want it ruined by waste of time thinking, chances are Vitoria Beckham or Danni Minouge are not  going to go to your funeral so dont allow yourself to think they are,dance to thier records by all means but when you leave the dancfloor tell yourself thats it.Realise,now that its the Natonal health Service not the National Lottery saving gay mens lives,remember as dolly  and tangerine Dale Winton is he's not singlehanedly dishing out complicated and costly combination therapies to the many thousands of gay men in need of them.Today take a moment to realise that a socialist inititive born of the Labour goverment of 1945 is far more important to our culture than any fashion accsesory could ever be that free medication is better than Louis Vuitton.Try it ,please you never know reality above fantasy it could work for you.So Im not gay who'dve thought it me Chloe Poems Gay Socialist Transvestite Poet and Gingham Diva not a queer.We live in strange times comrades where untruths are the paths we're happy to tread.Happy to condenm those telling the truth because it spoils things.It saddens me but does not defeat me,I hope one day those who consider me not gay will be able to recognise my arse banditness and we can live together in peace and harmony and I dont mean hairspray.Look after yourselves and eachother,Chloe X 


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